Case 9 – Luzhou interval-trial divorce mediation
Judge: Today morning, the divorce case of Wangjing and Litao will be heard.The plaintiff wangjing makes the declaration, stating the reasons of filing for a divorce.The defendant Litao answers to the declaration made by the plaintiff.At the same time, the plaintiff and defendant would carry out the testification, questioning and debate.Through the hearing, the case’s fact is clear and the responsibility definite.The court now seeks the plaintiff’s and defendant’s opinion on whether your both parties accept the intermediation of the court.
Plaintiff: Accept it.
Defendant: Me too.
Judge: As for both parties agree the intermediation; I would ask you to negotiate peacefully and respectively talk about your own opinion and request.
Defendant: Today in the presence of the judge, we speak out all our minds.By this opportunity we sweep some misunderstandings in the past.If it is my fault, I am willing to correct.If Wangjing can forgive me, that would be the best.If really we can’t reach an agreement, I wouldn’t force her.Merry meet, merry part.
Judge: The defendant Litao has talked about his own opinion and expressed the willing and good wish.Wangjing, you also talk about your opinion and request.
Plaintiff: My requests are: first, the court agrees the divorce between me and Li gang; second, our son Lijian should be raised by me, and Li gang should each month pay the allowance for the kid 300 yuan, and in the future the allowance will fluctuate according to the market price.In case the kid has fallen sick and go to hospital or go to university, which cost much, the allowance will be added accordingly; thirdly, now we have two apartments.One at Jianyan west road, with about 90 square meters, is allotted by Li gang’s unit, but it is us together after marriage to purchase it.in my opinion, this apartment can be awarded to Li gang, because it is more convenient for his work and living.Moreover, the apartment in lane Xiao should belong to me.And the kid and I will live in it.Our family’s largest belongings are the apartments, after the problem of apartments has been settled down; the belongings of the other stuffs like TV set, refrigerator and air condition would be easier to settle.It is doesn’t matter to me to have much or little.That is all my opinion above.
Judge: Just now wangjing has said her opinion, Li gang do you listen clearly?
Defendant: Yes, I do.
Judge: Li gang, in accordance of the questions wangjing raised, talk about your own opinion.
(Li keeps silent for about two minutes)
Defendant: Among the several requests raised by Wangjing, I agree some of them, but not the others.
Judge: Litao, be specifically, to what you agree, and to what you don’t.In addition, besides the requests Wangjing raised, do you have any other request?
Defendant: The belongings of those two apartments, basically I agree.But the apartment in Lane Xiao mentioned by Wangjing is also purchased by us together after marriage.It should be our joint property.That apartment with about 180 square meters large, is twice the size of the apartment my unit allots to me, furthermore, its location is much better, in the downtown, values more than the one in Dashanping.If Wangjing want the larger one, she should pay me 100 thousand yuan.Second, it is about the kid.I petition the court to grant the kid to me, because my parents much favor their grandson, and I have the ability to raise my child.Besides that I don’t have any other request.As for the problem of the furniture, TV set,refrigerator and air condition, it can be solved soon.(silent again, then speak soulfully) To be frank, I until now still have deep sentiment to Wangjing.I am unwilling to leave her, neither the son.I don’t want to break this family for some trifles.I request the court to make more efforts in intermediation.If something I do wrong, and Wangjing points out, I will correct.In the past, I have done something wrong, and I ask Wangjing to forgive me.
(Wangjing is move to tears.)
Judge: Above Wangjing and Litao both have peacefully talked about their opinions and request, both them are sincere in attitudes.Li gang asks Wangjing to forgive him and not to leave him by court…the court believe that your couple’s love foundation before marriage is deep.After marriage,you live together for more than ten years, and from every aspect, it is still rather harmonious.Certainly, some disharmonies still exist, for example, the husband likes making friends and often drinking and gambling outside so as to neglect the wife and not discipline the child enough.On the other hand, the wife treats the mother-in-law indecently, doesn’t communicate well in time when there are complaints, often loses her temper and quarrels about trifle things, so that it influences the couple’s harmony.Sometimes when the husband’s friends come to visit, the wife doesn’t give the husband face.Those are all the reasons in result of the disharmony between both of you.Since today it comes into such a situation, you both parties have fault and responsibility.To me, so far, you both haven’t reached the situation of divorce.The judge is unwilling to witness the brokenness of a happy family because of the couple’s bad temper.And it is unwise to disintegrate the family because of trifle things.Family is the basic unit of society.Harmonious family breeds a stable society.Once we can save a family, we all try our best.And that benefits us all.Now both of you need to calm down and recollect the merits of each other and check out your own shortcomings.Think for the kid, think for the family, ok? I want to talk to you both respectively.Litao, you come out first and rest for a moment on the stone stool, and I talk to Wangjing first.
(Li Gang leave the court)(https://www.daowen.com)
Judge: Now Li Gang has come out.You can detailedly talk about the course since your acquaintanceship to marriage and your opinion on Litao now.
Plaintiff: I first met Li Gang when we were in high school.He is a guy with wide interests, like sports, music and he made a good academic performance too.In an entertaining activity organized by the school, we perform on the same stage.Both of us have a good impression to each other.After graduating from high school, neither of us went to university.He went to the chemical school and I went to nurse school.When I was about graduating from the nurse school, once, he dated me to the cinema.After the film,he shyly gave me stuff.When I came back home and unwrapped the stuff, it is a pair of shoes and a letter.In the letter, he told me that he had fallen love to me since our performance on the same stage in the high school.But all the time he is too shy to speak it out.After reading the letter, I was much moved.Since I had a good impression on him before and he showed his love to me then, I agreed to be his girl friend.
After the graduation, he stayed and worked in the chemical school, and I was assigned to work in a hospital.After being together three years, we got married.In the marriage, we got along well with each other, and two years later, we got a child.And his mother came to live with us and help taking care of the kid as well as doing some housework.Because of the difference of views, I got some conflicts with his mother.His mother disliked my favor of dressing up and accused me squandering and neglecting the family.Once I overheard that they were speaking ill of me.His mother said: “Wangjing all day long enjoys herself, dressing well, eating well, even spending more than one thousand yuan buying clothes.And the wardrobe has been crammed with clothes, she keeps on buying.After the day break, she does nothing but making herself up oddly, with the black eye sockets, red lips and yellow hair, looks like a ghost.One day, I even saw her walking by a man in loudly chemise, closely and intimately,until reaching the downstairs, and then talked for a ling time, even held the hands on separating.”His mother warned him to watch closely on me.Since then, I began to have conflict with his mother.At the end, I had to ask his mother to leave my home.After the leaving of his mother,Litao doesn’t treat me as nice as before.Especially in the recent years, he seems like to change into another person,often spliting straws with me, even quarreling.In addition he didn’t come home after work, gambling with his friends and drinking, sometimes came home at two or 3 o’clock with drinking smell.Being like this so many times, I asked him to get out when we were all not calm, we began to quarrel and then I bit him and curse him.He would fight back, sometimes tore my clothes.When the quarrel got more and more, he even didn’t come home, with a maximum of leaving home five days without coming back.Leaving the child for me to take care, he just does nothing.When the electrical appliances and the water pipe were broken, it was me to ask others to fix.Now that he abandons this home.There is no existence of marriage.And those days of marriage have gone.
W: This kind of life has been meaningless.Therefore, I proposed divorce.After I composed the divorce agreement document and asked him to sign it.He would not.We fought multiple times, and friends and former classmates tried to persuade him, but he still played cards and drank alcohol.Even if he came back sometimes, we did not have words to say, neither did we live together.My heart has really become cold, so I filed to the court to request for a divorce.
J: After hearing your narration, I feel that the affection basis between you and Tai Li is good.You two knew each other even in high school, and had good feelings towards each other.When studying at technical school, although you were not in the same school, Li Gang had always had secret love for you, until later he boldly expressed his feeling and you two started formal dating.After several years’dating, you formally got married.It shows that your bonding is voluntary, and is, through deep thinking and mature consideration, a mature marriage.Besides, before your mother in law intervened into your small family, the relationship between you couple is also good.After you had the kid, your mother in law came to help taking care of the kid.Because, you and she are people from two generations, with different values, it is normal that conflicts arose.Due to the conflict between you and your mother in law, your getting a divorce, I think, is not wise.Whether you marry Li Gang or not, he is your partner and the person who spent a whole life to live with you, while the mother in law is elder generation after all, whom you live with if you can, and separate from if you cannot live with.As long as you fulfill your obligation as the younger generation, it is ok and you don’t have to live together.According to my observation, Li Gang still loves you until now.It is just that both of you have strong personalities.Some conflicts was not resolved in time, thus have influenced your affection.Objectively speaking, walking to this stage today, both of you have responsibility.To be honest, every family has a book of (Buddhist) transcripts that is hard to read.There is no perfect person in this world.Anybody has defect.The key is how to deal with it.When the family problem is resolved well, big issues will become small ones and small ones will diminish.If (you are) too serious, small issues will become big issues and no issue becomes some issues.In a word, (you) should know how to think and mutually forgive and tolerate.For Li Gang , except for drinking and playing cards, he has no big defects.According to the authorities in his unit, Li Gang is serious and responsible in his job, and has built a good relationship with his colleagues.His capable at work,versatile and good looking.His colleagues have high evaluation of him.The most important is that he still has a lot of affection towards you.To look for a person you love is easy, while to look for a person who loves you truly is hard.To say something unpleasant, if you got a divorce,the new found person would not be young, probably had marriage before, had kids as well.This required that people of your generation should get along, people of next generation should also get along.At the same time, it also required that the kid of the other party should accept you,and your own kid should accept the other party.A slight dissatisfaction would cause conflict.This kind of examples have been too many.Li Gang and you and the couple of first marriage, the kid is your blood offspring, and if you could make it up for each other, that will be the beat.If you can forgive him, I will talk to him.For his wrong doings, I will point them out for him seriously, especially,his beating you, excessive drinking, playing cards, even not going home to punish you, such wrong doings.I will ask him to apologize to you, and assure you that he will, to you, to the kid, to the family, take up the responsibility as a husband and a father.Will you forgive him?
W: In fact, in my heart, I feel that Li Gang is a relatively good person in all aspects, only has a strong personality and a high self-respect.We two do not have any big conflict.Mainly, on her mother’s issue, not having been able to deal with it well influences our affection.Just as what judge said, I am married to Li Gang, not his mother.Because of the conflict with his mum, my getting a divorce with him is not wise, does not worth it.If his mum does not like me,not living with his mum will do.We carry out what obligation we should carry out, go to see the elder when having time, in her life, in her economic need, we will take care of what we should take care of, we will be pious when we need to be pious.Thus, I think we won’t have any conflict.Please believe me, judge.I will handle the relationship well.To be honest, I feel ashamed that you have already been off work and are still trying to do persuasion work for us two people’s problem.I am quite moved.If I still didn’t listen to your persuasion, I would feel sorry to Judge.Please tell Li Gang, as long as Li Gang can treat me well as he used to, and be responsible to the family, I won’t get a divorce.A good family, who would want it to be broken up? I thought seriously for a while, Li Gang and I both have wrong doings.We both need to change.Later, whatever issue (we encounter), (I) will be calm and exchange opinions more.Small issues, (I) try not to fuss about.His proper social activities, drinking a little on holidays, playing some cards, I still agree.Having occupied so much of judge’s time.I don’t have anything else to say.
Judge: Good! Let’s stop here.You can take a rest outside.I will talk to Li Gang for a while.
(W left and H entered)
J: Li Gang , I talked a lot to Li Jing just now, and she has told me your story from beginning to the end.I have also did some persuasion work.Now I can tell you that Li Jing is a reasonable person, and can be counted as a good wife for you.To my knowledge, she has been awarded advanced worker in her hospital for many years.The authorities trust her and the people there sang high praise for her.She is a clever, capable, and all-round person.When studying in technical school, you started to court her,which shows that you like her.After the conflict of you two arose, she has not only worked well at her unit but also taken care of the kid and the family well.This shows that she is a responsible good woman with strong family value.Here, what I want to point out is that about this divorce issue, the major responsibility lies in you.From the angle of judging the case, I am judge.From the angle of age, I am older than you and am big brother.Here, I will scold you, as a man, you are too narrow minded.Just because there was minor fight between the couple, you would leave home, drank alcohol and played cards outside,even not coming home for several days, not caring about the wife, the kid, or big and small family chores.You did not fulfill the responsibility as a husband and a father.Li Jing ’s proposal for divorce, is caused by you objectively.You must ponder on it seriously, absorbing the lessons.You have requested the court to mediate the conflict many times, and now I can tell you in advance that through talking to Li Jing, she agreed to reconcile with you.Hope that you will respect the other party in the future, cherish the affection, care about the female party, and try to drink and play cards less.You must not stay over-night without going home.At the same time, I hope you could apologize to Li Jing in the court.Can you do that?
H: (being moved)Thanks, Judge, for your concern to us.(We) made you delay for so long, spent so much energy, and did so much work for us couple.Finally, you made us couple reconcile.Thank you for doing this big thing.I can only use actual action to repay Judge.Please, big brother Judge ask Li Jing to come in.I will apologize to her in front of you,begging for her to forgive.
J: Good.Note taker, please call Li Jing in.
(Li Jing entered the court)
J: Here are only me, note take Little Liu, and you couple.I have told you what I have to say.Now let’s see your action.
H: Judge has talked to us respectively, truly for the sake of our goodness.I am very touched.More words, I won’t say.I only want to say, “thank you.”—these two words.Now in front of Judge and note taker, I want to say to Li Jing, wife,I am sorry, any fault is mine.Please forgive me.In the future, I will love you as I courted you before, and won’t make you angry anymore.”
W: (sobbing) Considering about Judge’s face, I let you get away with it.Thanks, Judge.(bowing)
J: All right, that’s all right.Your making up is the best thanks to me.Now I declare the close of the court.After you and the note taker confirm the notes, if there is no mistake,please sign your names.Li Jing, after finishing writing the cancelation of the indictment tomorrow, turn it in to the court.
W: Ok.