Appendix　2

Appendix　2

In-depth Interview

Part One:In-depth interview

I.Topics

1.About marriage

　• Attitude toward marriage (positive or passive)

　• Quality of marriage (standard,forms)

2.About communication between wife and husband

　• Role of verbal language

　• Role of nonverbal language

3.About a conflict between a couple

　• Inevitable,impact,and result

　• How to settle it (what methods,forms)

II.Questions

1.What behaviors of your spouse hurt you deeply?

2.What let you fear when there is a conflict between you and your spouse?

3.Your spouse ridicules you or not? In front of the public or not? If yes,what feelings about it you have?

4.For soundly developing the relationship between you and your spouse,how you and your spouse should do it?

5.If you have a new lover,how do you do to your spouse?

6.If you found that your spouse has a new lover,how do you do to your spouse?

7.If you found that your spouse has a new lover,how does he or she do to you?

8.Whether does psychological abuse seriously impact on victims?

9.Is injure of psychological violence serious as the same as physical violence?

10.What basis should happy marriage be on?

Part Two:Vignettes

1.Story of communication

2.Story of verbal language

3.Story of the third partner

No.1 Mr and Mrs.Ze

A couple,Mr and Mrs.Ze have married for twenty years.Only at the first year of their marriage,they were very happy and loved each other.However,after the first year,Husband began to communicate with her less and less.In their family,Husband and Wife met each other like a stranger.Husband never greeted his wife.Wife wanted to communicate with her husband,but he would not like to sit down and listen to.Wife felt very sad and could not bear the situation patiently.So,she proposed to her husband that she wanted to divorce from him.However,Husband did not talk it with his wife at all.If somebody called Wife,Husband never told his wife who phoned her,but hung up it.Husband's behavior neglecting his wife let Wife not sleep every night.Once she felt sad,her heart would pain.Mrs Ze described that marital life between her and her husband seemed a twenty-year 'cold war'.Although her husband never battered her,she suffered mental violence.In the family,Mrs.Ze could not breathe under the indifferent/'cold' environment from her husband.

No.2 Mr and Mrs.Xu

A couple,Mr and Mrs.Xu have married for 6-7 years.Before marriage when they were in love,Husband was decorous and courteous.After marriage,Husband began to show his real nature.He was easily to be angry.When in a rage with his wife,he always cursed.For example,he swore his wife 'xxx','You are stupid like a pig','Sow',etc.However,without anger,he also used dirty language in the home.He called his wife as 'Stupid x','Pig head','A stupid pig'.Every time when he swore,his behavior of language and his facial expression reached to a peak of cruelty.When heard his calling,Mrs Xu felt that she was insulted.She thought that her husband did not respect her and not considered her as a person.More embarrassedly,her husband also did it in front of the public,e.g.their friends.One day,they visited their good friends.Husband was annoyed at his wife chatting with the good friends for a long time.Therefore,in front of their friends,he cursed his wife.He blurted out:'A stupid x,why you chatted too much,'Laozi' is annoyed and could nott wait for you for a long time!' Their friends surprised and asked why she married to such a man who liked to speak foul language.

No.3 Mr and Mrs Huang

A couple,Mr and Mrs Huang,have married for twenty years.Husband was a doctor.Although he did not divorce from his wife,he had a relationship with another lady.He wanted to divorce from his wife,but his wife did not agree with him because of saving completed family and their children.For this,he was angry.In order to achieve his goal:to divorce from his wife and to marry to a new partner,in daytime,he never communicated with his wife,and in night,he never slept with his wife.If he wanted to say something to his wife,he often blurted out dirty words such as 'Sow','Fat wife','A stupid wife' to his wife,which seriously insulted his wife.Sometimes,he held the photo of 'the third partner' and said:'Look at the photo,she is more nicely,beautiful and younger than you.You should leave me.Why do you keep pestering me?' For a whole year,he tortured his wife verbally.In the end,his wife's mental health was seriously influenced.She spoke incoherently and went around in a daze.In the end,she had to be in a mental hospital.